Ways to Honor Our Veterans - Insights from State Chaplain, Minnesota National Guard John Morris
November 11th is Veterans Day. According to the U.S. Census, the United States has 21.9 million veterans. We are home to 9 million veterans who are 65 or older.
It is an honor at Ecumen to provide housing and services for many who have served our country and to be a workplace for many veterans. We thank them for their service and sacrifices in protecting the freedoms we enjoy today.
How can we as Americans honor our veterans on Veterans Day and every day?
We've turned to State Chaplain, Minnesota National Guard John Morris, and father of Ecumen colleague Amy Williams, to provide his insights on that very question. We invite you to add to this list. If you have ideas you'd like to share in honoring America's veterans, please provide them in the comments section.
Honoring America's Veterans
The 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month presents us with an opportunity to pause, reflect and give thanks for the men and women who have worn our nation's uniform in the defense of our freedom. The following are several ideas on how you can make this day meaningful:
1. Pause and give thanks to God for the freedom and liberty you enjoy. While doing this, ask a blessing on the men and women who are serving us in Afghanistan, Iraq, Kuwait and many other places around our globe.
2. Fly your flag.
3. Visit your local nursing home and ask to visit with a veteran. Spend 10 minutes listening to their story. Give the veteran a big hug and simply say 'thank you.’
4. Visit your local American Legion or VFW and leave a Hallmark card for a lonely veteran. They'll be sure he/she will get your goodwill card.
5. Attend a local Veterans Day observance. (The newspaper and media websites list services. All the Minnesota Department of Veterans Affair website lists observances as well.)
6. Consider making a donation to the USO on behalf of veterans.
7. Volunteer to help at the Armed Forces Center at the Minneapolis/St. Paul Airport and help welcome military personnel as they pass through the airport.
8. Finally, simply say "Thank you for your service" when you meet a veteran.
A veteran IS a unique individual. At some point in their life, they offered their service to the nation. When they did they literally 'put their life on the line.’ That merits the appreciation of our nation, which is why we have 'Veterans Day.’
Reverse Caregiving?
As the second anniversary of the Great Recession comes & goes, one thing we don’t hear much about is the resultant change of the family structure. Intergenerational households have become an economic reality due to job losses and home foreclosures of recent years. But even more so by demographic changes, as reported by Pew Research Center. Households where two or more adult generations existed declined post-WW II until the late 1970s, but have steadily increased since. In 2008, 1-in-5 adults age 55 to 85+ lived in a multi-generational household. Of the 49 million Americans living in a multi-generational family household, 6% are in a "skipped" generation family unit made up of a grandparent and grandchild, but no parent.
In a separate report, Pew describes a sharp increase of children raised solely by grandparents since the recession began. One of every 10 U.S. kid lives with a grandparent with 41% of those being raised primarily by that grandparent.
Where’s a caregiving grandparent to turn for help? Mari Bell of GrandsPlace.org advocates the need for caregiving grands to make time for themselves. “In each parenting grands’ life there is so much to do that we can often lose sight of our own needs too.” Resources can be found but are few and far between. ROCK (Raising Our Children's Kids), serving 12 northern Minnesota counties, is a program offering crisis assistance, referral, and counseling. New York City's extensive Grandparent Resource Center provides information and referral, recreational activities, educational workshops, and advocacy for people raising their grandchildren. While we can’t wait for, nor expect, more programs to appear, one thing is for sure: a little self-care can go a long way. As Bell states “if we fail to care for ourselves and wind up burning out, then we will be of no good to anyone.” ~Helen Rickman
9,999,999 Kindred Spirits
Richard Taylor, a retired psychologist, was diagnosed with Alzheimer's-type dementia in 2001 at the age of 58. Now 67, he is a champion for individuals with early-stage and early-onset Alzheimer's disease, and author of the book "Alzheimer's from the Inside Out" (Health Professions Press, 2006).
The following plea by Dr. Taylor expresses what we at Ecumen believe in most strongly -- empowering our residents with Alzheimer's and other forms of dementia to live life as fully as possible. That's why we're embarking on a groundbreaking initiative at all of our skilled nursing centers to free these individuals from any and all unnecessary medications that are sadly, typically, prescribed to "calm" the most disturbing symptoms of dementia.
"Awakenings" is supported by a grant from the State of Minnesota, and we'll be asking for support from our friends in the community as well. Expect to hear from us in the coming months as we roll-out our campaign to end the unnecessary "chemical restraints" imposed upon dementia patients through the administration of antipsychotic medications. We can all be part of the next generation of respect for people living with dementia, and in honoring them, restoring their dignity.
Oh woe is me. Oh woe are 9,999,999 kindred spirits. Woe is the life of tens of millions of caregivers and those who know someone living with the symptoms of dementia. Oh woe is our plight, oh woe is our Nation. Like our pioneer ancestors we are all responsible for taking care of ourselves. We are each responsible for living purposeful, productive, loving lives. And for those with disabilities not of their own causing? "light at the end of the tunnel, great progress, breakthroughs?" I sadly think not.
When will we each and all stand up and speak out. Enough of this hoping/exaggerating/wishing/pretending. Let's put most of our research money where the real problems are - living with the symptoms of dementia and caring for folks living with the symptoms of dementia. For every one's sake, stand up and speak out. Vote with your donations, your political support, your discussions around the ipods/watercoolers/skype video calls/under the tables texting at work/in your church and community.
We don't have the luxury of waiting for physicians to be retrained, assisted living communities to grow up, nursing homes to realize more than that their residents are there because it's the only place Medicare pays the bill for room and board for people with dementia. We can no longer hope/pray/expect that the experts and current organizations and leaders will get "it." At least they won't get "it" in yours or my lifetime, and there are no current signs they will get "it" in the lifetimes of your children or grandchildren. Stand Up. Speak Out.
Jim Klobuchar - Reality Overtakes an Idyll of Years on the Trail
Norman Rockwell should have been there to sketch their memorable faces. They were wrinkled and unapologetically tired but sprinkled with the irony of trying to be festive in this, the last time they would gather. Someone in a harmless flight of conviviality called it a celebration. But it wasn’t exactly that.
They had hiked together for years, some of them for decades, members of the Minneapolis Hiking Club organized 90 years ago by one of the venerated heroes of the environmental and land preservation movement in America, Theodore Wirth.
At one time their club membership numbered into the high hundreds, packed with young and middle aged men and women who sought a healthy outdoor and social experience. The idea of group hiking in America was relatively fresh then in fact, so was was hiking itself as a reasonable promoter of health, adventure and an appreciation for the gifts of nature.
The club wasn’t intended as a dating service, but not surprisingly it also discovered that attraction. In time the hiking club expanded its curiosity beyond the t rails and shorelines of Minneapolis and St. Paul to the lake country and forests of Minnesota to the Appalachian Trail, the mountains of America and then the British Isles, Mexico, Nova Scotia and Switzerland. But by the late 20th Century the membership had declined irreversibly . The arrival of multi-service fitness emporiums, cycling millipedes and the accelerating speed and diversities of life made the idea of a hiking club-- especially one largely populated by graying seniors folks, well down the list of potential thrills for younger people interested in fitness, goals and social engagement.
Faced with its dwindling numbers and the actuarial charts, the Minneapolis Hiking Club voted with regret to disband this year. Older folks, they reasoned, still had a better handle on reality than some of the swifter generations. They held they their final gathering a few days ago in one of the dining rooms of the Town and Country Club in St.Paul, itself rather historic as the first major golf course built west of Chicago back into the 19th century. The round dining tables were more than adequate to accommodate the 67 members who attended. One of the women was introduced the genuine veteran, 99 years old. The talk was hospitable and wistful, washed with memories but touched with a kind of whimsical recognition of the unfairness of time.
I was invited to be the speaker. The reasoning was that a man who climbed mountains and trekked and cycled and skied in his earlier years and still does it in moderation, should have something in common with their lives in the outdoors. I did and addressed them honestly as “my fellow octogenarians.” But what I wanted to do most of all was to hug them and thank them, for being who they were, for carrying so long the ideal of sharing the innocence and grace of a woodland trail with those who had become part of their lives.
My message was less than profound, but it grew partly out of my own life of sharing the trail and the recognition that sometimes the most enduring gift we receive early in life is the gift of curiosity. Out of curiosity comes discovery. And one of the discoveries for these people once active but now considerably less spry—not too old to dream but a little too old to tangle with windy hills --was the one enduring realization: that when we sift out all of our experience, what emerges as the ultimate parts of our lives are not the successes or the excitements or the struggles but the relationships in our lives. So these old hikers had decided that the allure of the trail might be expendable. The friendships they built were not expendable. So at the end they sang their Happy Trails theme song. The party was over, but the bond remained.
At the doorway one of them, a little younger, was trying to organize a short hike as a kind of commemorative. She’d rounded up a half dozen takers and then invited me to join them. One last hike as a valedictory. I thanked her, looked at my watch and said I felt awful about it but I had another appointment in the next hour. She started to turn away; and I changed my mind, grabbed a pair of tennis shoes from my car and joined the hike. We walked through an old residential district of St. Paul , through boulevards smothered with gold and vermillion leaves and then to an overlook of the Mississippi with a stunning view of Minneapolis’ downtown towers. And finally there was a quirky little tower in St. Paul’s Prospect Park with a witches hat for a capstone. And there the fairy tale ended, one last walk in the fall.
The hiking club may have yielded to reality. The idea its men and women embraced is alive and lasting.
About Jim Klobuchar, Ecumen "Changing Aging" contributor: In 45 years of daily journalism, Jim Klobuchar’s coverage ranged from presidential campaigns to a trash collector’s ball. He has written from the floor of a tent in the middle of Alaska, from helicopters, from the Alps and from the edge of a sand trap. He was invited to lunch by royalty and to a fist fight by the late Minnesota Viking football coach, Norm Van Brocklin. He wrote a popular column for the Minneapolis Star Tribune for 30 years and has authored 23 books. Retiring as a columnist in 1996, he contributes to Ecumen’s “Changing Aging” blog, MinnPost.com and the Christian Science Monitor. He also leads trips around the world and an annual bike trip across Northern Minnesota. He’s climbed the Matterhorn in the Alps 8 times and has ridden his bike around Lake Superior. He’s also the proud father of two daughters, including Minnesota's senior U.S. Senator Amy Klobuchar.
Aging in Minnesota - Two Events - Mark Your Calendars
Two Twin Cities events coming up on Aging in Minnesota:
1. This Friday, November 5, the Minnesota Department of Human Services, Minnesota Department of Health and Minnesota Board on Aging will hold aTransform 2010 event on Preparing Minnesota for the Age Wave. Ecumen CEO Kathryn Roberts is slated as one of the guest panelists. More information here.
2. On November 9, the Vital Aging Network is hosting a forum entitled: Your Medicare After Health Care Reform: Making the Best Possible Decisions. More information is here.
Age Wave - How Minnesota Gubernatorial Candidates Would Approach it
Aging - where do Minnesota's Gubernatorial candidates stand on it? The Minneapolis Star Tribune did a Q&A series called "It's About Our Future" with the major candidates and asked each of them the following question:
What must Minnesota do now to prepare for the dramatic aging of its population expected in the years and decades ahead -- which could, among other things, increase long-term care costs and cut tax revenues?
Following are each candidate's response: [NOTE: Ecumen also sent questions to each candidate. Tom Horner was the one candidate who responded with answers. You can read them here.]
Tom Emmer, Republican
Minnesota is the best place in the world to live and raise a family. It is also the best place to retire, and more Minnesotans will be doing so in the coming years. That will mean fewer Minnesotans in the workforce and more demand for government services.
Raising taxes isn't the answer to these demographic changes -- growing our economy and creating new job opportunities is. Minnesota has to become more competitive, more productive and more attractive to new and established businesses. Economic growth will result in population growth to fill the economy's need for a skilled workforce. Higher taxes are a short-term fix that will create greater problems in the future. Workforce quality will become more important than ever. Reforming our education system to ensure more accountability and better results will help. The better educated our workforce, the higher our productivity will be. And more productive workers are better paid, which in turn will generate the revenue to fund what we expect from government.
A robust economy will provide the foundation for a better future. Higher taxes and more government are a recipe for a slower economy and fewer jobs for Minnesotans.
Mark Dayton, Democrat
Between 2010 and 2020, the number of Minnesotans who are 65 or older will increase by 40 percent. This means we need to change the same old way we have been doing things. For example, there are common sense -- and cost-effective -- solutions to help our elders live at home longer. Minnesota has made significant advances in its utilization of "Elderly Waivers," which fund home- and community-based services for people age 65 and older who need the level of care provided in nursing homes but who want to continue Advances in technology can help people keep track of their elder parents who are living independently with the confidence that their parents will receive immediate help in emergencies. This approach is a win-win; it expands options for people and saves money.
If I'm governor, my lieutenant governor, Yvonne Prettner Solon, will establish a "Seniors Service Center" in her office, which will provide one toll-free number that seniors can call for immediate help with state or federal programs or other needs. Our center, too, will help our seniors live their retirement years with peace of mind and security.
We also need to think more broadly about the tremendous assets that our seniors bring to their communities. People past the traditional retirement age of 65 still have major contributions to make -- as business leaders, advocates, classroom volunteers, mentors to small businesses, and contributors in the arts and civic endeavors. Most retirees have many years of energy and experience still to offer their communities. We all stand to benefit enormously from their contributions.
Tom Horner, Independent
The next governor should be a leader in creating a national reform model, changing how older adult services are delivered and how they are funded. Among my priorities are the following:
- Create more home-based, community and institutional care settings to provide a range of options to meet the needs of older Minnesotans, with a priority on helping people stay in their own homes -- to "age in place" -- for as long as possible.
- Streamline oversight of long-term care, assuring that high standards are being met but eliminating some of the costly overlap in regulatory agencies. With this, however, has to come strong consumer protection for older Minnesotans.
- Create new incentives for individual savings. One option is to adapt the popular college savings program (the so-called 529 plans) for older adult care. These plans give tax incentives for savings but allow flexibility in how the funds are used.
Beyond care reform, though, Minnesota will need to be a leader in other areas:
- Assure lifelong learning opportunities for those Minnesotans who want to stay in the workforce.
- Promote the expansion of access to high-speed broadband, allowing more Minnesotans -- including older adults -- to work from home.
- Continue to provide transportation alternatives to the car. More seniors will need more transit options.
- Reform the tax system. With more Minnesotans no longer earning wages, a consumption-based tax system will be fairer for all.
What's the Secret to Living Past 100?
Helen "Happy" Reichert, photo by Jurgen Frank
Do you think living beyond 100 is up to your genes or your lifestyle?
Helen "Happy" Reichert is 108 years old. She hates salads, veggies, and getting up early. She enjoys rare hamburgers, chocolate, cocktails, nightlife and smoking. And . . . she smokes . . . a lot. In an interview with Spiegel International, she says:
"I've been smoking for 80 years, all day long, every day. That's a whole lot of cigarettes."
We know smoking isn't good for our health, but why is Helen alive at 108 and living fully? Apparently, she and other "supercentenarians" are in a class by themselves, especially when it comes to genetics. But despite Helen's smoking habit, one study - Boston University's New England Centenarian Study - says centenarians it has studied does share some characteristics: The study is the world's largest sample of centenarians.
Characteristics in Common According to The New England Centenarian Study:
- Few centenarians are obese. In the case of men, they are nearly always lean.
- Substantial smoking history is rare.
- A preliminary study suggests that centenarians are better able to handle stress than the majority of people.
- The study's finding that some centenarians (~15%) had no significant changes in their thinking abilities disproved the expectation by many that all centenarians would be demented. Alzheimer’s Disease was not inevitable. Some centenarians had very healthy appearing brains with neuropathological study (we call these gold standards of disease-free aging).5
- Many centenarian women have a history of bearing children after the age of 35 years and even 40 years. From the New England Centenarian Study, a woman who naturally has a child after the age of 40 has a 4 times greater chance of living to 100 compared to women who do not.6 It is probably not the act of bearing a child in one’s forties that promotes long life, but rather, doing so may be an indicator that the woman’s reproductive system is aging slowly and that the rest of her body is as well. Such slow aging and the avoidance or delay of diseases that adversely impact reproduction would bode well for the woman’s subsequent ability to achieve very old age.
- At least 50% of centenarians have first-degree relatives and/or grandparents who also achieve very old age, and many have exceptionally old siblings. Male siblings of centenarians have an 17 times greater chance than other men born around the same time of reaching age 100 years and female siblings have an 8½ greater chance than other females also born around the same time of achieving age 100.7
- Many of the children of centenarians (age range of 65 to 82 years) appear to be following in their parents’ footsteps with marked delays in cardiovascular disease, diabetes and overall mortality.
- Some families demonstrate incredible clustering for exceptional longevity that cannot be due to chance and must be due to familial factors that members of these families have in common.
- Based upon standardized personality testing, the offspring of centenarians, compared to population norms, score low in neuroticism and high in extraversion.
- Genetic variation plays a very strong role in exceptional longevity.
Ecumen Opens New Senior Housing in Maplewood, Minnesota
Ecumen Seasons at Maplewood, a newly opened senior housing in Maplewod, Minnesota, is a good example of well-thought community design planning. The 150 apartments, which include independent living, assisted living, and memory care are located in a multi-age residential area, adjacent to a community walking trails and nature preserve and near Maplewood Mall and Healtheast Saint John's Hospital. Amenties include a spa with beauty salon, wellness center, movie theater, art studio and underground parking. Below is an inside look filmed by Ecumen colleague Helen Rickman ahead of last weekend's grand opening.
Don't Be Mean to Old People (Or Any People) - Check out the Video
Lesson learned here: Don't be mean to old people - or any people.
Jim Klobuchar -- A Man Confides His Pain
A Man Confides His Pain to His Best Friends
by Jim Klobuchar
For as long as they had known him he met all of the markers of the gregarious man. Despite his more than 70 years he was robust and strong physically, a man who had achieved professionally. He was also a marvelous story teller with a gift for self-deflation and good will. These seemed instinctive and made him popular alike with long time friends or just about anyone who happened to walk into his life.
He acknowledged that there was another part to his personality in an earlier life, when he could be charitably described as arrogant and recklessly self-involved.
But that was years ago. His life now, apart from the usual trials of getting old, had brought him contentment, the love and counsel of his wife, an acceptance of himself and what his friends saw as the gifts that flowed from his decision years ago to give up drinking.
These people, relatively older, meet regularly to renew their commitment to sobriety and to share the events of their week or month. The talk can be thoughtful and sometimes intimate but it’s usually nothing too ponderous and can get hilarious. But it’s generally a lot of expressed gratitude for the relative peace that has entered their lives.
Fundamentally, this comes down to the truth, hard and undeniable, about their earlier lives. Facing that truth and acting on it has not necessarily brought them to some gleaming grail of bliss. But it has restored them to the part of humanity they lost through their self-indulgence. Gathering each week is their recognition of a shared resolve to keep that commitment in the forefront of their lives because doing it alone—for them—is an invitation to losing it and all of the horror that follows.
Not long ago the man who had re-discovered himself and acquired these friends, and is usually at the center of the free-wheeling banter, asked permission to speak on a personal matter. He said he would have to leave early to be at his wife’s side. She had been diagnosed with inoperable cancer. He couldn’t know how much time she had left, but he needed to be with her this morning. He had a request. This was a strong and self-sufficient man unapologetically expressing a desperate need, a man who had been an amateur boxer and who had dealt with contention and crisis all of his professional life. He was now in tears of grief. His anguish was profound. “I’d like your support,” he said, “I need you.”
They gathered around him and embraced him, each in turn. There was almost no talk. And when it was over, one in the group drove him to the hospital.
What happened in the next hour of their gathering expressed the unbreakable bond that had grown among these imperfect men and women, recognizing once more that it was in the admission of their weakness that they had gained strength. They saw it simply and truthfully in the tears of a strong man asking for their help and embrace.
People who have grappled successfully with the ogre of addiction, and have lived beyond it to renew their gratitude for this freedom, often express the lessons of the struggle in axioms that seem to make sense. None more than this: “We’re only as sick as the secrets we keep.”
There are no more secrets for this man. There was an outpouring of love and kinship, a willingness to walk together with him and shelter him when the road is at its most difficult, but the mind and heart are clear.
It is the human condition at its best.