An Ecumen Chef's Perspective on Honor
Most professional chefs are well trained to cook for lots of different people with different tastes on any given day. But what if your job is to cook for the same 150 people every day? Not only do you have to be a versatile chef, but also you have to be a very good listener. Everybody has an opinion every day—and they’ll surely be back tomorrow. 
Chef Bill Evanoff at Ecumen Seasons at Maplewood is walking down the hall, making his way back to the kitchen, when a resident pops out of the dining room and corners him. “Chicken noodle soup is noodles—not macaroni!” she says empathically.
“Hey, chef, be careful of that one,” another resident chimes in. And Bill just smiles, patiently listening. He knows a guy wearing a chef’s white coat is also wearing a flak jacket. And he can take it.
Chef Bill politely points out that macaroni and noodles are the exact same thing, just in a different shape, and that macaroni is a lot easier to eat with a spoon. But she is not persuaded.
And by the way, she says, there are some things she would like to see on the menu and she has some good recipes she would be happy to share.
“Well, I would love to have those recipes,” Chef Bill says. “Lots of people threaten to give me recipes, but as long as I’ve been here, I haven’t gotten a single one. Think about what you would like, and let’s talk about it again.”
Bill Evanoff means it when he says he wants suggestions. He holds a monthly food forum with residents and makes it a point to walk the halls so he can get regular feedback. He is a proud professional chef, who has worked at top area restaurants and is passionate about what he does. He knows the key measure of his success is what the residents think of the food he serves. “This is their home,” he says. “This is personal.”
“My challenge,” Bill says, “is to change the dining paradigm to a daily event that resembles a restaurant experience rather than a ritual.”
Bill also knows that as the food and beverage manager of a senior living community he has to overcome the stereotypical perceptions of bland, pureed food lingering on steam tables.
“You will not find any steam tables in my kitchen,” he says. “And I don’t serve food out of a box. Fresh, hot food beautifully presented is my passion—scratch-cooked food, prepared on an individual basis.”
Bill’s from-scratch kitchen includes the baked goods. Especially the baked goods. Pastry chef Kristy Shelly was a baker at Keys Café & Bakery in Hudson, Wisc., before coming here, and Bill characterizes her talents as “world class.” He advises never uttering the words “frozen pie” in front of her.
In fact, what got Kristy interested in working in this senior living kitchen was a bad experience with another senior community. “My grandmother was in a care center,” Kristy said, “and she just hated the food.”
Bill’s monthly food forums with the residents help ensure that any issues with the food or dining experience are addressed immediately. He encourages the residents to be very specific about things they didn’t like. “I want names and dates,” he says.
His most memorable criticism came back in August when the kitchen featured 16-ounce T-bone steaks grilled to order and residents complained that the steak was too big. “If the size of a perfectly grilled steak is the greatest concern coming from the residents,” Bill says, “I’ll definitely listen—and privately wear it as a badge of honor.”
Bill has 30 years of kitchen experience. Before moving into the senior living sector, he worked at restaurants such as Tejas, Bar Abilene and the Blue Horse, a special-occasion Saint Paul restaurant no longer in business that many of the residents remember. He has also catered some high profile political campaign events for Walter Mondale, Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama.
At Ecumen Seasons at Maplewood residents order from a menu and everything is prepared to order. There are two seatings a day with a standard menu and one special each meal. But if you want something not on the menu, he will try to accommodate. As far as he is concerned, residents can have “anything they want within reason.” Once a month, there is a theme night. In October it was prime rib and popovers.
“We strive to create meals and desserts that people really enjoy,” Bill says. “It’s one of the best ways we can honor them.”
Ecumen Nurse Maria Reyes’ Personal “Awakening” and Triumph Over Adversity
Ecumen Quality Improvement Nurse Maria Reyes learned valuable lessons taking care of her grandmother as a young teenager in Puerto Rico—lessons that still guide her today as she teaches other professionals about honoring and empowering the seniors in their care.
Maria’s own determined journey to becoming a nurse was full of challenges, and her inspiring story recently was chronicled by her alma mater, Wisconsin Indianhead Technical College.
“There was something special about that girl,” recalls Ann Charbonneau, an academic affairs assistant who remembers the day Maria showed up at WITC. “I knew in my heart of hearts that Maria would become a leader in the medical community someday.”
Click here to read the moving story of how Maria found strength in adversity, found her calling and came up through the ranks at Ecumen, where she now champions the “Awakenings” program that uses non-pharmaceutical approaches to caring for those with Alzheimer’s and other forms of dementia.
The Story of JFK and PT 109 You Haven't Heard
Very few men can say they have run a race with a U.S. President—and won. Father Vincent Healy Arimond, a resident at Ecumen Lakeshore in Duluth, has that fond memory.
The President was John F. Kennedy Jr. The race was a PT boat scramble in the South Pacific during World War II.
JKF was then a young Navy lieutenant, commanding the now famous PT 109, which as PT boats go, was something of a heap. Fr. Vincent, before he became a priest, was the quartermaster on the much more seaworthy PT 60. The two boats were paired for night patrol near the Russell Islands.
In his memoirs, Father Vincent, recalled that night this way:
“After the night’s patrol duties, Jack (Kennedy) challenged our skipper to a race back to our Russell Islands base. We readily agreed, knowing he couldn’t possibly win. The flatter hull of our 70-foot PT 60 boat was lighter and faster than the PT 109, an 80-foot boat. An incentive was that our required refueling was first-come-first-served, in order of arrival, after which the crew would be free to take a swim in the bay to cool off.
“As we expected, we won the race easily. Jack did not like being beaten in a race. When we got into the harbor, he gunned the engine and plunged past us, a forbidden harbor practice in the Navy. As he headed for the docks he asked his motor-mac to put the motors in reverse. The intensity of the speed killed the motors, and he headed straight towards the dock with no way to check his speed. We watched as the boat plowed into the dock with a crash. The dock broke into pieces, the PT boat stopping when it hit the pilings that supported the dock. We heard Jack was in real trouble. The authorities assigned Jack to duty on the beach for a spell. This couldn’t last long, however, as we were all needed for the patrols.”
And, of course, the rest of the story has been widely publicized and made into a movie. Sometime later, operating from a different base, Lt. Kennedy went on patrol in PT 109 and the boat was cut in half by a Japanese destroyer. In a narrow escape from the crash, JFK led his 10 surviving men in an exhausting and heroic swim to a nearby island.
Father Vincent, who recalls frequently riding to Mass with Lt. Kennedy, is now 92 and living at Ecumen Lakeshore, where he has written his memoirs that recall the Kennedy story. After the war, Father Vincent returned to the States to become a priest. He did pastoral service in Duluth, Brainerd, Sandstone, Proctor and Morgan Park.
After 25 years in the priesthood, Father Vincent changed course. “Ultimately, I realized that I had promised God that I would serve in the Missions,” he wrote. He spent the rest of his career in Peru, Bolivia and Ecuador before returning to Duluth, where he retired.
Lt. Kennedy returned from his ordeal to become a Congressman and the 35th President of the United States. He was assassinated 50 years ago today.
A Volley Across the Generations Between Gustavus Adolphus College and Ecumen in Saint Peter
At a girls volleyball game at Gustavus Adolphus College in St. Peter, Minn., there is a rowdy group of ladies on the front row cheering enthusiastically. They might be mistaken for volleyball players’ grandmothers. But they are just very good older friends who have come from their assisted-living residence at Ecumen Sand Prairie, also in St. Peter, to show their support for these girls who have given them so much friendship and joy.
The Gustavus volleyball team has made sure their friends have the best seats in the house and have brought them roses to make them feel welcome and special. In return, the older women are cheering their hearts out.
This special relationship started about three years ago when Gustavus girls volleyball Coach Rachelle Sherden talked to her team about doing community service work—something the team could do as a team that was bigger than volleyball. The coach threw out the idea of a pen pal program with young kids. But the girls countered that they would rather exchange letters with senior citizens. After all, since they have gone away to college, they don’t get to see their grandparents all that much.
So Coach Sherden approached Becky Tapper, the activities coordinator at Ecumen Sand Prairie. Becky loved the idea. So did the residents. Now three years later, the program is still going and deep relationships abide. Some of the volleyball team members have been involved the entire three years.
The program began with the residents and the team members exchanging letters. Yes, actual letters—those nearly obsolete things from bygone times now displaced by texts and emails. It turns out that there is still something special about getting a letter, written by hand, coming from the heart. Coach would hand them out at practice, and the distance between the 20-year-olds and the 80-year-olds would rapidly shrink.
“The residents’ stories just blew the girls’ minds,” Coach Sherden said. “They wrote about how they grew up and all they have done in their lives.”
After a few letters, it was time to meet in person. The team went to Ecumen Sand Prairie for a visit. Coach Sherden recalls that she didn’t know quite what to expect from her team in this new situation.
“It was just so cool,” she said. “The girls were so excited when they met their pen pals for the first time. They were giddy like little kids. You couldn’t pull them apart. It was a hoot.”
“The chatter was overwhelming,” Becky Tapper recalls.
Clearly, this was not going to end when volleyball season was over. They made plans to stay in touch. The residents went to a volleyball game. They all followed up with a pizza party. And the next season came and the program started all over again, with some new volleyball players and some from the year before.
This is now the third year of the pen pal program, and Coach Sherden says she’s committed to keeping it going. The team loves it.
“One of a kind” is how sophomore Becca characterizes the relationship she has formed. “My pen pal is Doris, and I can’t tell you how thankful I am to have met her. Her beautiful spirit and tenacious attitude is inspiring to me, and I am so appreciative of the opportunity to connect with the elderly in my community. I love hearing about her life, her stories and her experiences.”
Amber, also a sophomore, says the program “creates this unique connection” that probably wouldn’t happen on its own. “It allows college kids and the residents to talk to someone over the best kinds and most rewarding forms of communication—writing on paper and talking with them face to face.”
The feelings are mutual with the residents. “It keeps us young!” says Marvel. “It’s invigorating. It’s wonderful to be a part of this.”
And Michele adds, “It gives me a feeling of being respected and a part of things—not invisible and left out.”
Marvel and Michele have plenty to share with their pen pals. Marvel was a teacher for 29 years, retired, started a new career in social services, became the mayor of her community and worked actively in politics. Michele was a music major who had a career working at a music store in Minneapolis before she took up photography and writing and co-authored two books.
“The girls want to know about everything,” Michele says.
That’s probably because stories of lives well-lived never get old.
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Honoring Aunt Daisy
Every Wednesday at 9:30 a.m., Marie Fegley, a resident of Ecumen Lakeshore in Duluth, transforms herself into “Aunt Daisy” and spends the next hour transporting children to a world of make-believe.
It’s story time at Little Treasures Daycare in Duluth, and Marie, wearing a dust cap and apron, reads to the children and takes them to faraway places. Before retiring to Ecumen Lakeshore three years ago, the native New Zealander managed a bookstore out East, where she started a story time for children.
She continued her reading program at Little Treasures, which serves at-risk children. Ecumen teamed up with Little Treasures three years ago to create an inter-generational program to foster the healthy development of children and increase the quality of life of older adults. At the time, Little Treasures needed a permanent home, and Ecumen had some unfinished extra space at Lakeshore that was converted into the daycare center with donations from local civic organizations, individuals and foundations.
Marie was recently recognized for her work there by the Northlands NewsCenter in Duluth, which told her story in its regular “Making a Difference” segment. Click here to link to the television station’s video.
Thank you, Marie Fegley, for all that you do for the children of Little Treasures. We honor you.
Irene Carlson's Dream Come True
Irene Carlson had a musical, infectious laugh and a wonderful sense of humor. When she walked around Ecumen Parmly LifePointes in Chisago City for most of her life-- first as a volunteer then later as a resident-- her laugh warmed the halls. Both she and husband Wally were dedicated volunteers.
Irene loved rolling residents to their doctor’s appointments and doing their hair in the campus salon. Once her pastor came to the salon when she was volunteering, and she offered to do his hair. While she was shampooing him, he fell asleep in the chair. Irene woke him up, but not before she outfitted him in a hideous curly wig. He thought she had given him a perm. Irene laughed and laughed, and they’re still talking about that day so reminiscent of her fun-loving spirit.
Irene and Wally, who ran the BP service station in Lindstrom, were known throughout the community for their generosity and community service. In fact, Wally was on the Parmly LifePointes board for 19 years. Their sons still run the service station.
About three years ago, Irene had some health problems and moved into Parmly LifePointes. And not long after, Wally followed. The day Wally moved in, Irene fell and broke her back. It was a long recovery, and during that time Irene loved going along the prayer walk outside the chapel, as she had done so many times before her injury. But the walkway was gravel and it was hard to maneuver her wheelchair.
Back in March of this year, she mentioned to Wally now nice it would be if the prayer walk were paved. It was so beautiful and calming and uplifting, weaving through the pines and stopping at the plaques and reading the Bible verses. She had walked it many times before her fall. How she wished she could use it now. Wally remembers that they talked about it several times.
But then in April, Irene died.
Wally talked to the kids, and they all decided Irene should have that paved prayer walk she dreamed about. Last Friday, November 15, 2013, the newly paved prayer walk was dedicated in Irene’s memory, thanks to the generous donation Wally made.
“This is a wonderful day,” Pastor Ron Gerls said at the ceremony. “Now this cathedral in the pines, this serene and holy place, is open to all, whether they are in wheelchairs or walking.”
Wally cut the ribbon and led family, friends and staff along the path that Irene cherished. Several wheelchairs made the trip.
The path circles 300 yards through the dense pine trees and about halfway through is a bench dedicated to Irene. “There was no resting spot there, and this was where she liked to go,” Wally said.
After the ceremonial walk, the group gathered at a reception with cupcakes, punch and coffee. Wally, who is 92, decided that, on this very special occasion, he would go all-out and have a cup of coffee, even though his doctor would not approve. So Wally drank his coffee, ate his cupcake and remembered Irene and all the joy she brought him. He summed it up this way: “sixty-eight wonderful years of marriage, four children, nine grandchildren and 14 great grandchildren.”
Irene would enjoy this very much, he said. She would love this new prayer walk.
“I know she would,” Wally said.
About Ecumen Parmly LifePointes
Ecumen Parmly LifePointes is a nonprofit senior housing and community services campus located in Chisago City, Minnesota, just north of the Twin Cities, offering independent and assisted living, memory care, care center, rehabilitative, and innovative, holistic wellness services for vital aging. Gifts from friends, families, neighbors and area businesses will continue to impact and enhance the services and amenities provided. Thank you for support and commitment to Parmly’s Mission of “Service to Seniors.” To consider a gift for Parmly, click HERE, contact us at 651-257-7332, or email.
Honor: Ecumen Resident Kenny Nelson
At Ecumen, we are very fortunate to work with people who have done so much for our country and communities.
A Visit with the Man with 125 Kids
When Larry moved into his new home two years ago, he had a little trouble adjusting. It took him at least a couple of hours.
Larry Bauer-Scandin was just 64 when he rolled into Ecumen Seasons of Maplewood. The mysterious nervous system disorder afflicting him since childhood was beginning to seriously limit his mobility and keep him in constant pain.
So that first night, feeling a little down, he pulled his motorized chair over to a window, looked out and wondered: “Is this it?”
He pondered that question. And then he did what he’s done his entire life. He moved on. He’s a tolerant guy, but if there is one thing he cannot abide, it’s a “poor-me” attitude.
The next day he was ready to start this new chapter in his life. Time to settle in, hang some pictures, make himself at home. After all, as Larry puts it, “There’s always somebody who needs something.”
No doubt, Larry has had more misfortune than most. When he was lying in his hospital bed for more than four months at age 9, unable to move, he had a lot of time to watch and listen and think. It changed him forever. He was never the same after he heard that little girl down the hall shriek the night she died.
His journey over the next few years had a few false starts, but Larry found his way and his calling. He was not meant to be a priest. Seminary didn’t take. As it turned out, his calling was to help people that nobody else cared about—murderers, rapists, drug dealers, gangbangers. He was a parole officer, jail counselor and a juvenile officer. He started dealing with kids that nobody wanted, the really tough delinquent cases that the system had totally given up on. The hopeless cases.
But by then Larry had decided nothing was hopeless. He started taking in a few of these abandoned teenagers as a correctional foster parent. The number started to build when it became clear to the juvenile authorities that Larry would take most anybody without flinching and, more importantly, would have a considerable amount of success turning these young lives around. At one time, he was taking care of 17 teenagers at the same time, buying meat to feed them by the hundreds of pounds, filling four freezers and three refrigerators.
During that time, Larry saw it all. Like a kid whose mother sold him into prostitution on the street. Like a kid who got cocaine as a birthday present.
Today as Larry sits in his assisted living apartment at Ecumen Seasons of Maplewood he can look proudly at a full wall of his children’s photos hanging in his office. There have been about 125 in all. The oldest is 59, the youngest 33. Some pictures really stand out. There’s the Saint Paul cop. “Every time I hear about a shooting in Saint Paul,” Larry says, “I pick up the phone and call him to make sure he’s all right.” And there’s the Marine, and the soldier in the field in Afghanistan. “And this kid here,” Larry says, “I’m pretty sure he’s a millionaire. He came from wealth but is totally estranged from his real parents. But he’s built a very successful business from the ground up.”
And then, there are the kids who are dead, Larry says, choking up. He does that a lot. He’s a tough guy who thought nothing of walking on a prison floor to diffuse gang tension. But he’s an emotional guy who tears up when he thinks about his kids.
Make no mistake, they are his kids. They call him “Dad.” He is the only real dad most of them have ever known. About 20 of them still stay in very close touch, especially the ones who still live in the area. Larry wishes he could get them all together someday for a picture.
Once he was on the Today Show, and Katie Couric asked Larry the most important thing he had taught his kids. “How to hug,” he said.
So these days, two years into assisted living, Larry finds plenty to do. He’s just gotten a kitten named “Little Bit” to hang all over him. And he’s always on the lookout for someone who needs a little help—or maybe needs a little lecture about how to treat people. Maybe he’ll make sure this lady gets her hearing aid battery changed. Or maybe he’ll have a chat with this gentleman who has just yelled at a staff member for no good reason. Or maybe he’ll roll down to see Joe, the housing manager, about a few things around the place that are bugging him. A guy who’s raised 125 teenagers is not shy about speaking up.
Raising all those kids, he’s learned a few things about keeping order. He’s always watching what’s going on, what’s being said, what’s not being said. Intervening when necessary. Saying what he thinks needs to be said. Shocking people from time to time with his bluntness and the rude bumper stickers on the back of his motorized chair.
In 2010, Larry published his autobiography, “Faces on the Clock.” The title refers to the finite time everyone has on this earth and what we do with that time. He’s thinking he might write a sequel.
The illness that has brought Larry to assisted living is still not definitively diagnosed. He’s seen a lot of doctors over the years and gotten a lot of different opinions. But now he’s decided he just doesn’t care about that any more. It is what it is.
He recalls talking to a doctor recently who asked him if he was depressed. “No,” Larry said without hesitation. “Why would I be depressed?”
“Well,” the doctor said, “I think you’d be crazy not to be.”
But on the balance sheet of fortune and misfortune, Larry figures he’s come out ahead. After all, he’s got many hundreds of faces on his clock.
Kathryn Roberts Named Chair-Elect of LeadingAge Board of Directors
Kathryn Roberts, president and CEO of Ecumen, is the new chair-elect to the LeadingAge Board of Directors. LeadingAge is the national association of nonprofit aging services organizations.
“Kathryn Roberts is a visionary leader who has created a culture of quality and innovation for Ecumen,” said LeadingAge President and CEO Larry Minnix. “LeadingAge is privileged to have her share her passion and expertise with our association as chair-elect.”
The LeadingAge Board of Directors is responsible for the governance of the organization, providing strategic direction, fiduciary oversight and development of policies. As chair-elect in 2014, and ultimately as Chair in 2015, Roberts will have the opportunity to help shape LeadingAge's work to transform the experience of aging in America.
Gayle Kvenvold, president and CEO of Aging Services of Minnesota said, “Kathryn is a leader in expanding the possibilities of aging, and will continue to bring her spirit of innovation, empowerment and collaboration to this new role.”
Roberts’ election marks the first time in association history that a member of Aging Services of Minnesota has been elected to this level of leadership position with its national association.